Alpha brought me home
A testimony from a member of our church community
I’ve always had a relationship with God, but it was at best distant and I would typically try to talk to him when I was asking for something or needed an answer.
Walking past Emmanuel Church on Christmas Eve in 2025 I felt compelled to just go in and try to re-connect with God, and that evening became so much more than that. Over previous years I had visited other Churches for friends’ weddings and baptisms, but this Church felt different and when Peter (the rector) invited me to Alpha on that Christmas Eve, it felt personal.
I had no idea what to expect from Alpha although I had a healthy dose of scepticism that there would be lots of good Christians trying to persuade me that I needed to attend church more and be a better human being. In reality it wasn’t like that at all.
As a small group we watched videos together that answered many questions and enabled lots of comments and observations through honest conversation in what felt like a safe place. My overall experience was that of not being judged, which was helpful as well as being a conducive way to explore. I was grateful for that. I also met like-minded souls on the journey, some of whom had the same questions and somehow that seemed to make it easier to open up our conversations. Having gone through that journey with them, I now refer to most as true friends, and that kind of friendship has a high value in any context, and yet it somehow seems more special because of our time together.
Almost 18 months later, I still have questions, and I still have huge moments of doubt and feelings of condemnation. But I have moved a little bit closer to Jesus, and I am coming to realise that he never really left me. In my dark moments I don’t feel so alone and I know that when we talk he really is listening. I’m also learning the importance of being still and listening closer to Gods whispser. In my light moments I know that Jesus is somehow orchestrating his plan, and that in some way I don’t fully understand, he is allowing me to live an amazing life.
I feel blessed that he does.
Thank you to Alpha.
